Most Awesomest Birthday Present Ever!

Over the bday weekend, I did nothing except take the MPRE, study, and write parts of a paper that I have been putting off...well, forever. I then asked my husband for a tiny birthday present. He says to me "Sure, go ahead."

So for MY birthday, I am getting a cleaning service in on the day before Thanksgiving to clean my house AND steam clean my carpets. Sing it with me "I feel pretty, Oh, so pretty, I feel pretty and witty and bright! And I pity any girl who isn't me tonight."

Right this moment, I would scoff at luxury vacations and diamonds. My birthday present is, without a doubt, the most awesomest ever! Not to gloat or anything :)

Hitting me that I am amost done

It was the MPRE that did it. I could fail and take it again in March, but the taking of it marked a passage into lawyerhood. I will be judged as ethically enough. The funny thing is, if I fail, it's because I am too ethical (thinking I must do something when I only have the option to do it).

Thank you MPRE for helping me realize that one day soon I will be a real attorney. Now my thoughts are consumed not with up-coming finals or projects, but rather with client meetings, moving into a new house and office, getting up for work instead of school, and all of the other things I look forward to instead of studying. The closest thing I remember from my last profession was defending my proposal during third year of grad school. This is way better. This is definite mark. No more, if. It's now officially in my head of when.

It's a shame that these tests don't come earlier in one's schooling. Because, for me, it creates a sense of relief. I am in law school, but it is a finite time. In second year, if I had been able to take the MPRE earlier (maybe I could have), then I would have felt that everything was more concrete, much less esoteric. That may not matter for some, but after spending so much time agonizing over whether I made the right decision, a little concreteness would have helped.

So to all those out there that have this step out of the way (theoretically), let's celebrate the milestone. We are so close to being finished and for our "lives" to begin, that we can now see the finish line. I will miss law school and the fact that my decisions on hypos affect no one. But I won't miss the constant second-guessing my decision or wondering if I should take a course or worrying about impressing my profs. I will be a "Real Man of Genius."T

Eating my own words

I guess Sunday all day is out of the question. So instead, we scheduled a 3 day weekend vacation for Thanksgiving weekend. Until then, I will work so I have that 3 days.

On Beating Burnout

Yes, it's that time of the semester kiddies!! The time when every deadline looms near and the minor freakouts come more frequently. Burnout is the unfortunate result in most cases.

What is burnout? Burnout is both mental and physical exhaustion that leads to very bad things. It begins with a dragging feeling, although that indicates you are well into burnout phase. Work seems bigger, more onerous. Soon, everything, even pleasurable events, are harder, both physically and mentally, to get through. You put things off, things take longer than usual, you wake up feeling tired no matter how much sleep you had, and, ultimately, you begin to feel defeated or even hopeless.

If you don't think you have ever experienced burnout or think it won't happen to you, check your mental responses. See how tired you are day to day. Get 8 hours of sleep a few nights in a row and see how you feel when you wake up.

I am obsessed with recognizing burnout. I spent years in my last career in burnout mode. It took me weeks to get out data for something that should have taken days. Months for weeks...you get it. And I didn't recognize it until my first year of law school. I thought I was just slower than everyone else. Truth was, I was exhausted. So my first summer, I took about a month and did absolutely nothing. And slowly I came back. I still have to monitor myself, but I am much better at recognizing the signs.

Luckily for you (and me), Fearfully Optimistic has provided a link to short-circuiting burnout. And if you don't think it's important, numerous studies show that burnout has a huge effect on GPA. If a person is not mentally prepared during the exam, that person is going to miss things. Go ahead, ask me how much my grades improved after taking time off. Yeah, they were second year classes, but they all had a stiff curve.

So as I see myself beginning to slow down on work, taking 2 hours for writing one page instead of an hour, etc, I know it's time to do something that seems absolutely inconceivable to the average law student. I will cut back. This Saturday is the MPRE. So Sunday I will stay home and relax. Yeah, I will have to come roaring back on Monday. But because of Sunday, I will come back!

Coffee shops

I love coffee shops. I love coffee. But unlike every other person I know, I can't work/study in a coffee shop. It sucks. But I get way to distracted by everything going on around me.

1. Heavenly Daze - too intense. The law students there are simply far too studious. The groups really study, they aren't gossiping about anything. So I can't concentrate because the people around me are intensely talking about cases from first year. No thanks.

2. Starbucks (anywhere, but especially Barnes and Noble) - too many "writers." They sit at their table, surrounded by books they will never buy, periodically tapping away at their laptops. And they are writing. Sort of. Then they look up to check out the crowd. Okay, I am completely cynical. I assume they are checking to see if anyone is watching them write. Can't concentrate there because I am making up conversations ("Oh, yes, this new novel is about the death of man, death of society." "Really, sounds fascinating. My new character arc is taking me so many new places.") I know, I am catty. They are probably good people trying to break into an impossible field. But my thoughts are far more fun than Tax.

3. Wilde Roast - all time favorite place. Great food, fantastic coffee, and fun conversations to listen to. That group is discussing biofuels and organizing a new symposium. That group is discussing human rights issues and gay marriage (eck, I want to interject a legal argument. that's how crappy my thought processes are). That group just came out of the bookstore next door with an armload of homosexual erotica and are now critiquing it. How can anyone ever read through Tax with that in the background.

And I can't even study with music. So I resort to earplugs and then folks look at me weird because I have these huge orange things sticking out of my ears.

Call it anything you want...I got senioritis.

I laughed when I heard 3L's talk about it. Seems silly right? We are all grown-ups here?

But I try to put in the hours and I find myself staring at this stuff thinking, I am never going to use this (I know that now) so why do I care so much. Is it noble to study for the pleasure of learning? I am winning zero nobility awards.

Back to Tax. Yeah, right. What's on Hulu?

What's wrong with me that I don't get Twilight?

I devoured Harry Potter books and movies. I love fantasy, vampires and angst. But the Twilight series is a boondoggle to me. I thought it might be because I am older than the target audience (outside of puberty ). But it turns out most of the women I know my age and older looovvveee the series. So what am I missing?

I thought maybe the movie would speak to me where the book couldn't. Nope. I felt that the movie was all angst and no vampire. I mean the whole "I love you, I can't have you" stuff was the movie. It just so happened to be vampires in the movie.

And now I get this odd woman left behind feeling. I feel like I SHOULD like them. Which, of course, given my contrary nature leads to me disliking them more. Maybe I should go back and read the first one again. Or maybe I should give up. I don't have to be on every bandwagon!