I am getting tired, depressed, and I want to pull out of it. I can feel it creeping in. The almost crying, the sleeping a little later everyday, the lack of energy, watching TV instead of studying.
This scares me because I need to do better on exams this semester if I am going to be competitive. But in my head I hear that voice saying, "do it tomorrow." God, this is hard and ego-crushing. I left a career (okay, so I didn't like it) to be in school and get rejected on nearly a daily basis. Newest development, I can get rejected from a job in less than 24 hours. In the span of 3 days, I get turned down from multiple jobs.
I watch these folks just out of undergrad getting jobs and all I can ask is why? And I haven't screwed up an interview...I don't get interviews.
This whole experience is killing me. I sound like this is so poor me. But, good lord, I am having a problem with this whole keeping a positive attitude shit. So I am in a bad mood, but still need to do the right thing and study.
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2 comments:
Hey there - I can't remember how exactly I found my way over here, but I just recently discovered your blog, which I was thrilled to find because I'm 38 and leaving academia to start law school in the fall. So I just kind of wanted to say hi, and say I've been there with the depression, and I hope you feel better soon (I'll probably go back to lurking now, but wanted to kind of introduce myself).
Hey new kid, you kind of caught a highly self-pitying moment on the blog.
Thanks for reading and looking forward to reading through your adventures in law school.
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