Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Break downs and self pity

Wow, I can't make it through even one day without crying...a lot. I feel simply devastated. What does one do when confronted with their own horrible performance? How do you bounce back when you think you did well, but it turns out you were completely wrong? How do you ever trust your judgment again?

I break down every day. I find it hard to get through a day. I know this is depression, I know it is starting to get black and dark. I know that I have to find my way out before it gets really bad. But right now, all I can think is that I am stupid, stupid, stupid. And worthless, a waste of space.

3 comments:

3L Wannabe said...

Oh honey. I am so sorry you are down. Please know that MOST 1Ls don't have jobs that they wanted in this summer, and it doesn't mean much other than, time to study, take a summer class, or relax and NOT be a law student for awhile. You are NOT your grades or your GPA. You are here for a reason. Now go to the beach. Or the library. Or take a pottery class or yoga. You need a break from thinking about this bullshit.

Eliza said...

I can't believe that this has affected me so much. It surprised the hell out of me.

You are completely right :)

3L Wannabe said...

LOL I been waiting for someone, somewhere, somehow to realize that I am yes, completely right.

Just kidding. sorta.

But SO pleased to "hear" you sounding a bit more upbeat. This shit sucks. There is no way around it, so you gotta pull up the big girl britches and wade on through it. You are awesome. Grades are useless. You win.