Review of "Moonlight" or how CBS can so disappoint me

Vampire show, I'm on board. I even used to watch this horrible late-night show called Forever Knight.

But this show, a show that could have rocked, just blew chunks.

Add a bunch of stupid monologues by a brooding vampire, a female reporter that has no depth or change of expression, sprinkle with one of the worst scripts out there, and let sit for an hour. And you wind up with Moonlight. Oh, and I forgot about the ridiculous backstory connecting male vampire to female reporter. And steal the crazy female vampire character from Buffy.

The show begins with the lead character being interviewed, which of course...well, I won't give away the surprise, though it's a dumb one. What ever happened to allowing (1) characters to develop over the course of multiple episodes and (2) answer questions that need to be answered through action. He can't be killed by sunlight, just put him in the freaking sunlight. Not combusting will clue the freakin' audience in.

I usually will watch anything having to do with vampires. But I am not watching this piece of shit.

I like, I really like it

When I forget being tired or pissed off about being confused or I don't talk to a couple of people for a few days, I realize that I really like law school. I like the thinking involved and the logic, no matter how stretched. I even like Civil Procedure (it's not love, just like).

I can't believe I am blogging the age thing

I realize that as you age, there are certain alterations to your body. But does it have to be so many. And why, oh, why, does one of them have to be energy. While I know if I was in better shape, I would be more energetic. But I still won't be able to go to the drinking events during the week and roll into class without a care in the world the next day.

Gee, does that sound juvenile?

Self sabotage and other realizations

It's hard for a sane, intelligent, fairly accomplished person to admit, but I self-sabotage all of the time. I am doing it right now.

And I hate myself for it. Every time I walk away from my desk KNOWING that I absolutely need to finish that assignment (or paper or proposal or experiment), I feel self-loathing.

I do not want a repeat of the PhD. I do not want, a year from now, to think, "Yeah, I would have had _____, but I didn't work hard enough." I want to not care so much about Law Review, Moot Court, Fancy BigLaw Firm, and everything else. I want, REALLY want, to do my best and be happy with that. I want to work hard and be happy with my efforts. Because behind the sabotage lies the ugly truth. I am terrified I am not good enough to be on Law Review, get picked for BigLaw, etc. And what it boils down to is that I am not good enough.

Eww, enough realizations today. I'm going back to CivPro.

Jackass Neighbors

As a neighbor of others, I attempt to (1) not be loud; (2) not encroach upon others property; and (3) not attempt to bend my neighbor's behavior in accordance to how I feel they should act. But living next to people, there comes a moment when you just want to walk onto their lawn and torch (preferably with a flame thrower that "accidently" singes those goddamn ugly lawn ornaments that simply should be put out of their misery) the one thousandth "nice" note left by your neighbor to alert you to some major issue that must be attended to, for instance parking.

I have never enjoyed attempting to park on the street. I just don't want to do it. Luckily every where I have lived, I have made sure to have, at the least, a driveway. But our neighbors do not have a driveway. And we have people who live with us, sort of. And they have 2 automobiles. Which they park on the street. And the neighbor seems to believe that the street in front of her/his home is strictly for their use. While I know it is annoying to come home and have to walk about 10 feet more than normal, IT'S A PUBLIC STREET.

Now am I going to walk over there, hand the note back, and politely tell them to shove it up their ass? No, I am going to ask the nice couple living here to move their cars. Why? Because I KNOW in my bones that if I interact AT ALL with these people, I will become homicidal. And we own this home, we want to stay in this home. And we live VERY close to these people.

I HATE NEIGHBORS!

First week has lead to therapy_light therapy.

Not to be interpreted as "diet therapy" where you spill your soul in 100 calorie increments. No, I mean light as in the sun. It seems that being married, having pets, and having the personal goal of dropping around 100 lbs combine to be being NOT conducive to late night studying, rising late, and barely making it to class on time. This seems to only work if you can either thrive on 4 hours sleep, you never want to see your significant other or, more commonly, you are a single law student. So because I am trying to spend time with DH and the pets, cook some semi-healthy meals, get to the gym on a regular basis, and get all my studying done, I find myself getting up at around 5 AM. I wasn't even sure there was a legal 5 AM, but sure enough it happens. And it doesn't matter that the days are fairly long, it's freakin' dark at 5 AM. I keep hoping the 5 turns into an 8.

So I whined, um explained this to a few people the other day. I love my friends. As an aside, being 40 is awesome because your friends tend to have real careers established. My friend the psychiatrist started going into light therapy and the difference it can make with people, especially those that have Seasonal Affective Disorder or ADHD (me), and need a big boost to their inner clock. So on her advice (I will attempt to stick her with the bill if this doesn't work), I have purchased a Sunset/Sunrise alarm clock, which is exactly what it sounds like. In the evening, you program it to slowly bring down the light and same for am. So by the time my alarm goes off, the light is fully on and I have been exposed to light for about 15-20 minutes. The second thing I purchased is for during the day. It's a small, portable light box. I just sit in front of it for about 15 minutes at a time and it's supposed to really stem those afternoon slumps.

Here's hoping I didn't just flush a bunch of money I don't have down the drain.

I had no idea.

You can read the books, listen to what others have to say about it, and talk to professors and attorneys. But it didn't really prepare me for this. I am swamped all of the time. I was behind by the second day of classes. I just said good-bye to my weekends.

And I can't figure out if it's just me. It feels like everyone else is getting the reading done much quicker than I am. But then I just learned something horrible about my learning. I do not really get something until I have created notes for it. I am a transcriber. Reading doesn't do it. I can read passages until the cows come home, whatever the hell that means. But if I don't write it down in my own words, I don't learn it.

I am hanging on to the one bit of hope, it will get easier. If nothing else, it will get easier to say goodnight to everyone and turn back to my books. It will get easier to pour myself into the shower at 5 am to get more reading done before class. And it will get easier to only have a few hours on the weekend to "play." I know I have to get faster, more efficient, but with this whole bit about writing things down, I don't know how.

Any one can chime in on this, please!