One more before the bar

I am studying furiously now (in wild and stormy manner). I converse on nothing except the bar exam. I am truly the most boring person on earth right now. I have told my DH to please not try to have conversations with me because I am only allowing 20 minute breaks for most things.

The bar exam and accompanied studying are only temporary, but a major difficulty is getting someone in your life to truly believe that it is temporary, you are not yourself, and what you need right at that moment may seem truly selfish. My DH was a little peeved that I took time (about an hour) to sit and watch TV before I went to sleep last night instead of talking to him. I didn't want to talk to him because that would require (1) interaction and energy and (2) me giving a crap right now about someone else. Yeah I know how that sounds, but when he starts in about his day, RIGHT NOW, I don't care. Two weeks from now I will care again.

So to all those people that have to be in contact with bar studiers, this is what you need to understand. Taking the bar is an entirely self-centered process. For 8-10 weeks, the person that you love, like, are friends with, will turn you down for most invitations, whether or not that bar taker takes time off or not. Please don't take offense and for f*** sake don't lump more stress on the bar taker by making them feel guilty. This is the only control a bar taker has, what they do with the precious few minutes they allow themselves during this time. For me, I just don't want to deal with any one else's shit, so I don't tend to interact with others (except DH and a few other bar takers). Please don't think I don't like you, it will go away in 2 weeks.